Your guide to seven (now eight) new pieces of sustainability jargon

With that all-important opening day of April 2013 approaching fast, here's your quick guide to some of the latest management thinking and new theories:

1) The Spherical Economy
Circular calculations and costings are so 2012. The Spherical Economy matrix now in use across the Fortune 100 enables you to calculate your full planet impact beyond low earth orbit.

2) The New Political Bottom Line
The latest addition to the "Triple Bottom Line" the New Political Bottom Line is a strategy which guides your board to calculate the extreme limits of political tolerance of your behaviour in your region, nation and valued-added chain.

3) Your Social Balance Sheet
How is your company doing in that all-important sociological sphere? Is your company seen as authentic in social situations, for example? The new metrics of your social balance sheet calculations will allow you to force-curve your own organization to the winning lane.

4) Our Planetary P&L
An annual ranking of Earth's economic, social, environmental and governance performance, measured against nearby solar system competitors. Offers serious perspective.

5) Stakeholder Rankings
This begins with asking your CEO "When you were growing up, which was your favourite stakeholder group?". This approach will help you prioritise who you engage, and when, and whom to cast aside.

6) Stakeholder ReachAround
Similar in a way to stakeholder outreach, this technique is more inclusive, engaging the stakeholder for truly simultaneous mutual benefit. Circling back around in order to reach out, however, is not included, and may not be possible.

7) Stakeholder Tromboning
This new technique, based on a traditional tactic, involves reaching out to core groups, only to pull back quickly with a sharp exhalation of hot air once expectations are on the table.

15/02/13 UPDATE: A further excellent reader suggestion is below:

8) The Social Extrapreneur
A new global statesman for a border-less business world. Nothing more, nothing less. 
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